Entries from May 2009 ↓

So says one of the chapters of Guy Kawasaki’s books called Rules For Revolutionaries.

When people give you advice, do you take it more serious than your own judgment? Many do so and later regret having let others manipulate them. Remember that advice can be tricky, especially when not given from your closest friends and family.

Always rely on your own judgment and make decisions using your own brains. Rely on advice that you received, yet hadn’t searched for, only when you can’t make that decision by yourself. Don’t let the bozos grind you down with their false concern and malicious advice.

How to distinguish the bozos from those who care for you? Well, bozos are usually negative and always tell you that what you’re trying to do won’t work. People who care for you will help you find a working way to do something, they focus their advice on the solution, not on the mission impossible.

The article was inspired by my friend Mike Ramm’s great article in his Bulgarian blog. Thanks, Mike!

Image by Lotus Head

If we can learn something about being a good communicator, it will be from Dale Carnegie. He was one of the earliest speakers and founders of the self improvement industry that nowadays spans the globe.

So if you haven’t read one of his best books called How To Win Friends And Influence People, I really recommend doing it. In this article I’ll share Dale’s top 10 tips on becomming a great communicator that became golden for me. Ones that I try to follow each day and each time I speak.

Dale Carnegie’s 10 Golden Tips

1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Become genuinely interested in other people.
4. Smile.
5. Be a good listener.
6. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
7. Make the other person feel important.
8. If you’re wrong, admit it.
9. Show respect to the other person.
10. Let others do a great deal of the talking.

The book was first published in 1953, but the advice it contains have proved timeless. Mobile phones, social networks, VoIP communication often make us forget the basics of being a likeable person, such as the ten above. That’s why the few people who still remember them stick out from the crowd. So why not be one of them?

The really happy people I know put remarkable diversity into their lives. One friend plays golf and currently is one of the best in Bulgaria because he loves it. Another one likes winter sports and goes to winter resorts each time enough snow falls to go skiing or snowboarding.

The list of the things that smiling and cheerful people do never ends. They always find something new to do. Something to devirsify their everyday lives. Something that makes them feel like a conqueror of new continents.

So? What’s the lesson I learned today?

Always search for something new to make your life exciting. It could be sports. Or going somewhere new with family or friends. Or finally going to a date after your divorce. Or creating that new blog you feel excited about.

Whatever you do, always bring diversity into your life.

Wrote the post offline. The reason was that I had forgotten to pay my bill and simply didn’t have the time to do it the same day. What struck me was how much I can actually do without browsing the web and checking out social networks.

Internet is a productivity killer, isn’t it? And it doesn’t end here. It often slows down personal development. We read articles, communicate with self improvement bloggers, we get motivated, but we don’t actually do something to improve our lives. We continue browsing until we find the next wise thoughts to read.

From today I’ve decided to limit my browsing hours and the time I use to check my email and what’s going on in Facebook or Twitter. The challenge? Two hours per day for personal browsing. It may not sound like much, but I think it’s quite enough.

What about yourself? Do you think that internet is a productivity and personal development killer, especially with all the distractions it offers? I wonder if you could limit your browsing time, how much per day would you give yourself? Thanks in advance for sharing your point of view by commenting.

There comes a time when you have to think about who you really are. You are, like me or everyone else, a persona of positive and negative qualities. You can’t pursue true happiness unless you accept both of your sides.

Accepting yourself means admitting that you know who you are. It’s the first step towards a positive change of your negative aspects. It’s simple: you can’t change something for the better if you’re not completely sure what it is.

Try this tip: lie down on your bed by yourself and ask yourself the question “Who am I really?“. Just let those thoughts emmerge but don’t get emotional. Put some reson into unreasonable thoughts like “I’m a boring speaker.” Say “I’m a boring speaker, because…” Now choose three things you so willingly want to change and write them down. During the next 30 days, do as much as you can to make change. I wish you the best of success.