So I noticed that a noticeable number of readers have been searching for ‘signs of intelligence in a casual conversation’ in my blog lately. Challenge accepted – here are my two cents on the topic!
How to make the impression of an intelligent, interesting person in a casual conversation?
Rule #1: Less talking, more listening.
Every single person on this planet wants to be heard. But few are willing to listen attentively and with genuine interest to what others have to say. So to make people like you and have a great impression of you, practice the all-mighty habit of listening to others in a conversation.
Be curious about people’s thoughts, opinions and beliefs. When somebody is talking to you, look them in the eyes and listen to what they have to share with noticeable attention. You’ll be surprised how much you can learn! Because intelligence is not just about sharing – it’s about being able to attain new skills and mindsets at any time of day, in given any situation.
Rule #2: Combine concrete opinions with concrete facts or beliefs.
What makes intelligent people different from ‘unintelligent’ people is the ability to make their thoughts and opinions count by backing them up with concrete; rock-solid facts.
So try this out: in the next 30 days, try to back up every strong opinion with a strong fact:
“I really like this, because…”
“I don’t quite agree with John, because…”
Use the golden word: because. But take care to use the right kind of arguments in your conversations with the two sexes. Whereas men are driven by logic and facts, women emphasize on emotions and beliefs. Accept this bipolar nature of humanity as a gift, adapting the way you communicate and share ideas accordingly. Here’s an example:
When you’re having a conversation with men: “I prefer shopping online, because it saves me time, money from driving all the way to the city center and having to go through five shops just to find one shirt that I would consider buying.”
When you’re having a conversation with women: “I love shopping online, because it feels fantastic to be able to pick one item that you really like and have it delivered right to your front door, without having to drive all the way to the shop and having to leave disappointed that you haven’t found anything that I would really like to buy.”
Notice that slight difference? Try it out and see for yourself how effective it can be in your everyday life. You’ll be amazed how many doors this humble little trick can open up for you.
Rule #3: Improve your body language.
Intelligence is not just about knowing something. True intelligence – academic and interpersonal, is the ability to share your thoughts, opinions and beliefs effectively.
An essential part of making a good impression on people you meet is good body language. Make the commitment to educate yourself really well on that topic and you won’t be sorry.
Start with your posture – keep your head up and your spine straight. Breathe deeply and relax as much as you can. Then slow down your movements. Don’t be too reactive to your surroundings. Use your hands to express your thoughts, just like speakers on television do.
For some advanced knowledge on body language, read What Every BODY is Saying - a book that you won’t regret buying. And most importantly, practice improving your body language skills every single day. After all, you have the whole world as your test field.
Now go test these rules out for yourselves!
That’s pretty much it. Three simple ways to make an impression of an interesting, intelligent person every time you have a casual conversation with a friend or new acquaintance. It’s up to you to try them out for yourself, adopt them to fit your personality and become a much better communicator. I wish you the best of success!